This is my song of the day: Light by the Rocket Summer:
All I needed was a light in the darkest place
I've ever been in all my life, as I try to find my way
And the changing season of my life and my eyes don't see
The things I love have run their course, are they done?
Are they just beginning?
And I'm old enough to know that time doesn't move slow enough,
And young enough to know that I can't ever be too old enough to trust You!
Higher and higher I wanna go there with you,
Some say your fire, your fire is through...
And I don't wanna think that way.
So it's been about 2 and a half months since I've been home from the mission, and there's been a LOT of adjustment happening up in here! On the mission the weeks felt like days, and the days felt like weeks; now the weeks still feel like days, but the days feel like minutes! I feel blessed with work, direction, and most importantly a considerable amount of love in my life... it has been incredible to experience the changes that I underwent out in the mission field! I knew I was changing, heck, anyone who read my e-mails home knew it, and boy oh boy how I grew! ...and how I continue to grow! It's been interesting to face similar life situations that I had in the past, and see them differently because of who I have become!
It's made me ponder a lot on how to keep this going:
Finding balance on this road I travel is a task for sure... it's like I have a book on my head and I'm trying to walk on a balance beam with it: the book is all my tasks I need to complete coupled with the everyday routine I need to be involved in; and the balance beam is spinning over a river that turns into that waterfall on Emperor's New Groove! haha, but for real, there's a new balance to be found every day, and there's an elegant peace that comes with that new accomplishment.
Of the many activities of daily life that I've become acquainted with since I've been able to expand the ways in which I can consecrate my life unto the Lord has been working at the temple!
Another place that has helped me to gain perspective has been at institute class, where I'm learning more about God's word in a class on the book of Revelation and the book of Isaiah! :D It's basically foolproof, when you open the scriptures to have the Spirit speak to you and relate it to your life in some way, but in a classroom setting (and taking away the grading part of it), there's conversation and revelation that comes in very few other fashions... we spoke about balance in my Isaiah class, and my teacher explained this to us:
This little picture shows a person's heart being weighed with a feather... now I'm no scriptorian or Egyptian historian, but in common man's term's I'll explain my understanding of this, and how that understanding has helped me obtain a little more light and truth in my life.
So they had a belief that your heart would be balanced with a feather... in the scriptures it often talks about "hardened hearts" and how as we go through this life we have an opportunity to receive literal spiritual heart transplants, where we trade in our "stony" heart, to receive a lighter heart of sorts (Ezekiel 11 and 36). When we are baptized, we are reborn in Christ, our hearts change, the scriptures have many references of changing hearts paralleling lives coming in line with God's will. And the Egyptians had some partial truths in their faith (I mean, the children of Israel were in bondage there for a couple generations right?), and so, at that last day when you were judged (the balance representing justice), a light heart would balance out with a feather.
I remember our teacher drawing another parallel my mind loves with the word light, it's very flexible in its meaning! It's not only a weight, but it's also a source of sight right? When we say the room is light, we generally aren't talking about its weight right? :D Anyway, as our hearts change, and those stony hearts are removed from our spiritual chests, and we receive the word of God, which is literally Christ (because everything testifies of Him), and He is truth and light personified; our hearts are filled with His light, and balancing out with a feather is perfect imagery for that do you not agree?
Anyway, it makes me happy to think about... our time here is short! My time is short, but each moment is a blessing, each soul I am able to become acquainted with, each child of God I am able to assist on the path back to our Father, each one that is able to help me... it can seem a little stressful and chaotic, but at that one perfectly balanced perspective... from that angle there is an angelic beauty that can only be understood through the Spirit's impression.
With all my heart,
Heather Ann Lagrosa
